Joe Toplyn

  • Home
  • About
  • Blog
  • Galleries
    • “Late Night with David Letterman”
    • “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno”
    • “Monk”
  • Events
  • Media Page
  • Contact

Tag Archives: Clinton

Joke About Bill Clinton in the Hospital

Posted on October 25, 2021 by Joe Toplyn

The joke:

Yesterday former President Bill Clinton was released from the hospital after being treated for an infection. While he was there he got intravenous antibiotics, intravenous fluids, and 14 nurses’ phone numbers.

How I wrote it:

This news story got my attention because it involved Bill Clinton. When I was working for Dave Letterman I wrote hundreds of Bill Clinton jokes. So I thought I’d write one about this story for old times’ sake, particularly because Clinton wasn’t very ill.

Whenever I write a joke I try to have it say something that pretty much everybody will agree with; that way I won’t split the audience. In the case of Bill Clinton, one association that almost everybody will agree with is that he loves the ladies and the ladies love him.

So I decided to use that association of Bill Clinton. But to employ my Punch Line Maker #1–Link two associations of the topic–I also needed an association of “treated for an infection,” the other likely topic handle.

At first I considered using the sub-association “got fluids” to write a punch line referring to how Bill Clinton got into trouble as President by “giving his fluids.” But that seemed too icky.

So instead I linked “got fluids” with a different sub-association of Clinton’s philandering: getting lots of phone numbers. To make that laugh trigger as effective as possible, I made it the last item in a list, as suggested by my Joke Maximizer #10–Use the Rule of Three.

Why did I pick 14 as the number of nurses? Because the number was clearly large but not so crazily large that the audience might be distracted by a thought like “Wait, even a major hospital doesn’t have 2,367 nurses.”

I also wanted the alliteration between “14” and “phone numbers” because my Joke Maximizer #7 is “Use stop consonants, alliteration, and assonance.”

Posted in Joke Writing Workshop | Tags: Clinton, hospital, infection | Leave a comment |

Joke About Hillary Clinton’s Novel

Posted on March 1, 2021 by Joe Toplyn

The joke:

Hillary Clinton is co-writing a mystery novel. She loves mysteries and this one sounds amazing. It’s called, “How the Hell Did Trump Beat Me?”

How I wrote it:

This news item caught my eye because I hadn’t written a Hillary Clinton joke in a while. Plus the other topic handle, “mystery novel,” seemed to have a lot of associations that I might link her to. That is, I thought I could use my Punch Line Maker #1: Link two associations of the topic.

Most associations that Clinton used to have–her pantsuits, her emails, her philandering husband–are now too stale to hang a joke on. But one association is still fresh, years after the presidential election: how she can’t understand why she lost to Trump. So I created a punch line that links that association to an association of “mystery novel,” namely “mystery.”

But writing the joke this way wouldn’t quite work: “Hillary Clinton is co-writing a mystery novel. It’s called, ‘How the Hell Did Trump Beat Me?'” The problem is that the title “How the Hell Did Trump Beat Me” describes a mystery but not the plot of a mystery novel.

To smooth out that bump, I wrote an angle that includes the word “mysteries,” to focus the audience on just the mystery aspect before they arrived at the punch line. But I also added “this one sounds amazing,” to subtly mislead the audience into thinking that I was still describing her novel.

This joke is an example of how to write a political joke that’s unlikely to divide a mass audience. Whether you’re a Clinton fan or not, you’d probably agree that she’s still wondering what went wrong in 2016.

Posted in Joke Writing Workshop | Tags: Clinton, Hillary, Hillary Clinton, Hillary Clinton joke, Hillary jokes, mystery, novel, Trump | Leave a comment |

Sign up to get more tips and offers from Joe.

Joe’s Tweets

Joe Toplyn 10 hours ago

Today President Biden is hosting a Fourth of July barbecue at the White House and giving a speech. And this is interesting: Biden says he wrote the speech about the Declaration of Independence using the very same quill pen he loaned to Thomas Jefferson.

Joe Toplyn 13 hours ago

This joke about the Fourth of July...how was it written? Learn how in my two-minute Joke Writing Workshop: bit.ly/3abpVTs

Joe Toplyn 3 days ago

Air New Zealand is adding six sleeping pods stacked up like bunk beds to some of its airliners. The sleeping pods will be available in three sizes: Regular, Full-Size, and Mile High Club.

Joe Toplyn 3 days ago

It's the Fourth of July weekend. So if you love to see lots of fireworks and explosions, just go to the airport and watch people when they hear their flights are canceled.

Joe Toplyn 4 days ago

Two women were arrested at a Bangkok airport after 109 live animals were found in their two suitcases. On the bright side, airline officials said the animals had more room in the suitcases than they would have had in economy class.

Joe Toplyn 6 days ago

An Idaho man broke a Guinness World Record by walking 3.4 miles while balancing a guitar on his chin. But this is weird--then Guinness gave him an expensive new guitar, with no strings attached.

Categories

Pages

  • About Joe
  • Blog
  • Contact
  • Events
  • Media Page
  • Photo Galleries
    • “Late Night with David Letterman”
    • “Monk”
    • “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno”

Recent Posts

  • Joke About the Fourth of July July 4, 2022
  • Joke About Revlon’s Bankruptcy June 20, 2022
  • Joke About the Series “Obi-Wan Kenobi” June 6, 2022
  • Joke About Overpriced Beer May 23, 2022
  • Joke About National Teacher Appreciation Day May 9, 2022

Pages

  • About Joe
  • Blog
  • Contact
  • Events
  • Media Page
  • Photo Galleries
    • “Late Night with David Letterman”
    • “Monk”
    • “The Tonight Show with Jay Leno”

Archives

  • July 2022
  • June 2022
  • May 2022
  • April 2022
  • March 2022
  • February 2022
  • January 2022
  • December 2021
  • November 2021
  • October 2021
  • September 2021
  • August 2021
  • July 2021
  • June 2021
  • May 2021
  • April 2021
  • March 2021
  • February 2021
  • January 2021
  • December 2020
  • November 2020
  • October 2020
  • September 2020
  • August 2020
  • July 2020
  • June 2020
  • May 2020
  • April 2020
  • March 2020
  • February 2020
  • January 2020
  • December 2019
  • November 2019
  • October 2019
  • September 2019
  • August 2019
  • July 2019
  • June 2019
  • May 2019
  • April 2019
  • March 2019
  • February 2019
  • January 2019
  • December 2018
  • November 2018
  • October 2018
  • September 2018
  • August 2018
  • July 2018
  • June 2018
  • May 2018
  • April 2018
  • March 2018
  • February 2018
  • January 2018
  • December 2017
  • November 2017
  • October 2017
  • September 2017
  • August 2017
  • July 2017
  • June 2017
  • May 2017
  • April 2017
  • March 2017
  • February 2017
  • January 2017
  • December 2016
  • November 2016
  • October 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • June 2016
  • May 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • February 2016
  • January 2016
  • December 2015
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • February 2015
  • November 2014
  • October 2014
  • September 2014
  • August 2014
  • July 2014
  • June 2014
  • April 2014
  • March 2014

Categories

  • Joke Writing Workshop (348)
  • Late-Night Writing (13)
  • Writing Tips (12)

WordPress

  • Log in
  • WordPress

CyberChimps WordPress Themes

© 2014 Joe Toplyn. All Rights Reserved.