June 2016 - Joe Toplyn

Cambridge University says that two notebooks written by Charles Darwin with his ideas about evolution have been stolen. Witnesses described a suspect who started walking on all fours, then walked in a crouch, and finally walked upright.

Joe Toplyn 3 days ago

It's the day after Thanksgiving and a lot of people are trying to finish off their Thanksgiving leftovers. You know what they call Thanksgiving leftovers in the White House? The Trumps.

Joe Toplyn 4 days ago

Today is Thanksgiving. To celebrate, President Trump invited Joe Biden to a turkey dinner with a new tradition: whoever gets the bigger piece of the wishbone gets to be president.

Joe Toplyn 5 days ago

Tomorrow is the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade. Each balloon will have two dozen specially-trained handlers who will make sure it doesn't drift off course. You know, the way they do for Joe Biden.

Joe Toplyn 6 days ago

Today President Trump pardoned the National Thanksgiving Turkey. Then he introduced his own take on the annual tradition by putting on a turkey costume and pardoning himself.

Joe Toplyn 7 days ago

A ride operator at Disney World stopped a ride when a guest took off their mask. The strict new Covid rule came from the eighth Dwarf they added after Sneezy and Grumpy: Fauci.

Joe Toplyn 7 days ago

Thanks for letting me know, @ElBadiablo ! I'm thrilled to hear that my book was so helpful. twitter.com/ElBadiablo/sta…

I just wanted to thank you. We started a Late Night show 'El Late Night' in Juárez México (next to El Paso Tx) that lasted for 5 years. Your book taught us everything we needed. Now we have Mexico's #1 podcast 'Leyendas Legendarias' And it all started with your book and a dream.
— Satan's Sheriff (@ElBadiablo) November 23, 2020