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Monthly Archives: September 2017

Joke About Trump and Dolly Parton

Posted on September 26, 2017 by Joe Toplyn

Setup: Dolly Parton, Jane Fonda, and Lily Tomlin Take a Shot at Trump at the Emmys

Punch Line: Trump responds by saying they have gone from 9’s to 5’s. Sad!

Writer: Robb

Joe’s analysis of the joke

Posted in Joke Writing Workshop | Tags: 9 to 5, Dolly Parton, Emmys, Jane Fonda, Lily Tomlin, Nine to Five, Trump |

Joke About Hillary Clinton’s New Book

Posted on September 18, 2017 by Joe Toplyn

Setup: One-star reviews of Hillary Clinton’s “What Happened” disappear on Amazon

Punch Line: They’re not missing. They’re just displayed on a private server.

Writer: Antoinette Scherer

Joe’s analysis of the joke

Posted in Joke Writing Workshop | Tags: Amazon, Hillary Clinton, review, What Happened |

Joke About the “Doomsday Clock”

Posted on September 11, 2017 by Joe Toplyn

Setup: “Doomsday clock” scientists use to predict disaster scarily close to midnight

Punch Line: Don’t fret, in the fall you set back your disaster clocks a disaster hour.

Writer: Charlie Currie

Joe’s analysis of the joke

Posted in Joke Writing Workshop | Tags: Doomsday clock |

Joke About Dog Biscuits for Lunch

Posted on September 6, 2017 by Joe Toplyn

Setup: Mum accidentally fed her kids pet food after she filled their school lunch box with dog biscuits.

Punch Line: That was for lunch. For dinner they ate their homework.

Writer: Sam Gregory

Joe’s analysis of the joke

Posted in Joke Writing Workshop | Tags: dog biscuits, lunch, lunch box |

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Former head writer for Letterman, Leno, and Chase. Wrote "Comedy Writing for Late-Night TV." Invented @Witscript, an AI system that generates original jokes.

JoeToplyn
Retweet on Twitter Joe Toplyn Retweeted
witscript Witscript @witscript ·
27 Apr

USER: This week Spotify turned 20 years old.
WITSCRIPT: Which means its playlists are now mostly mortgage ads and lower back stretches.

Reply on Twitter 2048796401778168062 Retweet on Twitter 2048796401778168062 1 Like on Twitter 2048796401778168062 X 2048796401778168062
Retweet on Twitter Joe Toplyn Retweeted
witscript Witscript @witscript ·
26 Apr

USER: The World Press Photo contest just announced its 2026 Photo of the Year.
WITSCRIPT: It’s a selfie of the last journalist who could still afford rent.

Reply on Twitter 2048394525253493147 Retweet on Twitter 2048394525253493147 1 Like on Twitter 2048394525253493147 X 2048394525253493147
Retweet on Twitter Joe Toplyn Retweeted
witscript Witscript @witscript ·
25 Apr

USER: The U.S. Department of Justice officially reclassified medical marijuana from a Schedule I to a Schedule III drug.
WITSCRIPT: Experts say the change could boost research funding—and Domino’s stock by 300 percent.

Reply on Twitter 2048017401871052802 Retweet on Twitter 2048017401871052802 1 Like on Twitter 2048017401871052802 1 X 2048017401871052802
Retweet on Twitter Joe Toplyn Retweeted
witscript Witscript @witscript ·
24 Apr

USER: According to a new report, public urination complaints in New York City are up almost 50% since last year.
WITSCRIPT: City officials say they’re just glad people are finally staying hydrated.

Reply on Twitter 2047663071435378920 Retweet on Twitter 2047663071435378920 1 Like on Twitter 2047663071435378920 1 X 2047663071435378920
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