May 2017 - Joe Toplyn

Joe Toplyn

Joke About a Punished Playboy Playmate

Posted on May 30, 2017 by Joe Toplyn

Setup: Playboy playmate Dani Mathers ordered to clean graffiti as punishment for naked gym photo

Punch Line: She’s also been ordered to do so with huge sponges, tons of soap suds, a bikini, and in slow motion.

Writer: Zack Guido

Joe’s analysis of the joke

Joke About Bob Marley’s Grandson

Posted on May 22, 2017 by Joe Toplyn

Setup: Grandson of Bob Marley Signs Contract with NFL

Punch Line: The contract was immediately rolled, lit on fire, and passed around the room.

Writer: Eric Wickstrom

Joe’s analysis of the joke

Joke About a Cow Sex Suspect

Posted on May 15, 2017 by Joe Toplyn

Setup: Cow sex suspect hunted by police helicopter

Punch Line: Subject is 5’11”, white, with a milk moustache

Writer: Daniel Pulzello

Joe’s analysis of the joke

Joke About Nude Photo of Teacher

Posted on May 8, 2017 by Joe Toplyn

Setup: 2 students accused of distributing nude photo of teacher

Punch Line: She gave them 2 D’s

Writer: Lee O. Valentin

Joe’s analysis of the joke

Joke About Cellphones and Tumors

Posted on May 1, 2017 by Joe Toplyn

Setup: Italian court finds link between cellphone use and tumor

Punch Line: But the good news is, the tumor gets great reception.

Writer: Niki Galiano

Joe’s analysis of the joke

Joe Toplyn 23 hours ago

Yesterday was National Blame Someone Else Day. I was all set to write a great joke about it yesterday but Elon Musk distracted me.

Joe Toplyn 2 days ago

Today Elon Musk put his deal to buy Twitter "temporarily on hold" because he's concerned about the number of fake accounts. He said he could tell some accounts were fake because their tweets actually made well-supported points in a calm and respectful manner.

Joe Toplyn 3 days ago

This week NASA said that the James Webb Space Telescope has achieved perfect optical alignment. Apparently that involved focusing the telescope on a distant galaxy and asking it "Which is better? This?...Or this?...This?...Or this?

Joe Toplyn 4 days ago

Until recently North Korea claimed it had a perfect record in keeping out the coronavirus. But on Thursday North Korea reported its first coronavirus infection. Kim Jong Unhappy.

Joe Toplyn 5 days ago

Yesterday a former chemist for Coca-Cola was sentenced to 14 years in prison for stealing trade secrets for China. The Pentagon was very concerned. Apparently the Chinese were developing a powerful new missile propelled by Diet Coke and Mentos.