Setup:
A 500-year-old skeleton still wearing thigh-high boots was found in London’s River Thames.
Punch Line:
How embarrassing…those boots are so 499 seasons ago.
Writer:
Jonathan Flanagan
Author Archives: Joe Toplyn
Joke About Postal Workers and Cocaine
Setup: Postal workers busted delivering cocaine
Punch Line: Everyone grew suspicious when the mail started to come on time.
Writer: Tom Powers
Joke About Finding a Lottery Ticket
Setup: Louisiana couple finds $1.8 million lottery ticket while cleaning their house!
Punch Line: “Nice try, Mom,” said every kid everywhere.
Writer: Jan Williams
Joke About Chris Christie Replacing Sessions
Setup: Chris Christie being considered to replace Sessions as attorney general
Punch Line: If you believe that, I have a bridge with two lanes closed to sell you.
Writer: Benjamin Hardy
Joke About Twitter’s “Like” Tool
Setup: Twitter to remove ‘like’ tool in a bid to improve the quality of debate
Punch Line: But when are they going to remove all the other tools?
Writer: J.D. Smith
Joke About the Police and Flatulence
Setup: Man whose farts ended police interview pleads guilty
Punch Line: He had the right to remain silent…but deadly.
Writer: Matthew Hall
Joke About a Naked Man and a Shark
Setup: A naked man was seen swimming in the shark tank at a Toronto aquarium.
Punch Line: Briefly.
Writer: Laura Bruce
Joke About a Ronald Reagan Hologram
Setup: Ronald Reagan Hologram Unveiled At Museum Dedicated To Him
Punch Line: He’s there, but he’s not really all there…just like when he was President.
Writer: Chip Fenwick
Joke About Dead Rodents at the Movies
Setup: Slew of dead rodents found inside local theater
Punch Line: Also found dead in the theater, everyone’s subscription to MoviePass.
Writer: Dave Stolz
Joke About a Booby-Trapped Wheelchair
Setup: A booby-trapped wheelchair shot an FBI agent at a house rigged to ambush intruders.
Punch Line: Home Alone XXVII: Kevin’s Final Showdown
Writer: Scott Benjamin